One of the rules of thumb with certain people I work with is this: Ask forgiveness, not permission. In other words, do something whether or not it's the right thing to do because it has to get done - because if you ask permission and they say no, you can't do it. So I've sort of adopted this mentality for a few things in my own life. I just do something to get it done without asking permission because I just have to get it done, period. Or I take the liberty of doing something that someone might not like, maybe because I think I deserve it or because of my pride or selfishness.
Anyway, I have found, however, that this is really not a cool thing to do. Not because you don't succeed in getting things done, but because if the person you needed permission from gets mad at you for what you did, or it puts you in an awkward situation, it's really embarrassing. At least 3 times in the past few months in particular have left me in tears because I got scolded for some things....and a TON of little things too.
For example, I still get embarrassed when I think of a few situations in particular that really humbled the snot out of me. Okay, this was in like 2003 or so, I think my last year of being a summer camp counselor. It was rainy outside so we decided to have evening vespers indoors with all the kiddies. It was a great atmosphere, lights were off, candles were lit, I was leading worship. Then it was also my turn to speak for devotion. All summer I had with me a book called Jesus Freaks about martyrs and their stories. I decided that it would be really compelling to share with the group about this one particular Christian camp for kids in Indonesia or something. The story basically went like this (cliff notes style): buncha' Christian kids at camp, they heard gunfire a long ways away but they didn't have any cars to take people to safety, so the adults went to town to rent vans, the adults got killed, and the people with guns were coming through the woods to kill the kids. I went on to explain how scary that might be and it ended up to be a sort of Gospel lesson. Yeah, does anyone here think that was a GOOD story to read to little kids right before they walked back to their cabin in the pitch dark and go to bed? NO, probably not, though it made perfect sense to me at the time. Anyway, I totally got called out on it from the camp director and I felt like a total buffoon. If I only would have asked if that story was appropriate first!!!
For example, I still get embarrassed when I think of a few situations in particular that really humbled the snot out of me. Okay, this was in like 2003 or so, I think my last year of being a summer camp counselor. It was rainy outside so we decided to have evening vespers indoors with all the kiddies. It was a great atmosphere, lights were off, candles were lit, I was leading worship. Then it was also my turn to speak for devotion. All summer I had with me a book called Jesus Freaks about martyrs and their stories. I decided that it would be really compelling to share with the group about this one particular Christian camp for kids in Indonesia or something. The story basically went like this (cliff notes style): buncha' Christian kids at camp, they heard gunfire a long ways away but they didn't have any cars to take people to safety, so the adults went to town to rent vans, the adults got killed, and the people with guns were coming through the woods to kill the kids. I went on to explain how scary that might be and it ended up to be a sort of Gospel lesson. Yeah, does anyone here think that was a GOOD story to read to little kids right before they walked back to their cabin in the pitch dark and go to bed? NO, probably not, though it made perfect sense to me at the time. Anyway, I totally got called out on it from the camp director and I felt like a total buffoon. If I only would have asked if that story was appropriate first!!!
Side note, I really don't like getting scolded...no, I kinda hate it. In elementary school if the teacher told me to stop talking or stop doing something, I would seriously be crushed and/or start to cry. I don't cry every time someone tells me to stop doing something, but the older you get, the more "somethings" you do are more serious and personal. What used to be "don't cut in line" is now "you need to consider the way you live your life" kinds of things. I just don't take it well. I'm not saying that to make everyone feel awkward when they really do need to scold me...Blah blah I know it's a part of life and I have to deal with it. I'm just being honest - I know it's necessary but I still don't like it, especially when I disagree with the cause.
Regardless of that though, my official advice is to just shut up do the right thing. Ask permission about things, not forgiveness...just stay on the safe side, okay? Do it for me! I don't want you to feel as stupid as I have. If they don't let you do something you wanted to do, then at least you won't feel like an embarrassed loser like me. It may appear goody-two-shoes-esque but I don't really care anymore...better than feeling like a loser!